#6 Taming the tongue trouble

Speech 6:  Vocal Variety

• Does your voice put your audience to sleep? Does it put you to sleep?
• Do you find it hard to convey emotions with your voice?
• Are you easy to listen to, or does your voice let you down?

The sixth Toastmasters speech project guides you to harness the power of your own voice. This article of the Toastmasters Speech Series examines the primary goals of this project, provides tips and techniques, and links to numerous sample speeches.

Why is This Speech Important?

• pace,
• pitch,
• power, and
• pauses.

Speech starts here:

Mr. Toastmaster...fellow Toastmasters,

I used to ride horses alot when I lived in Georgia.  Had you ever watched me, you would think I was a natural. Had you stuck around to see me get off the horse, you would see my hands clenched tightly by my side and sweat start to roll down my worried face.  You would see me back as far away as I could. When I set my feet down next to a horse's, you would realize I am no longer the girl who sat so bravely on the saddle.

Maybe it is because I am so small.  Or maybe because when I am in the saddle with a handle on the horse's reins, I know I am safe.  Even though the bit which is in the horse's mouth is so small, it is the key to steering this massive, gentle animal.  How can something so small as a bit be the key to controlling the direction of such an animal?

It is the same with ships.  No matter the size, the ships are controlled but by a small helm, or steering wheel.  By a flick of the wrist, the ship is able to turn this way or that.  No matter the wind, the waves, or the amount of weight it carries.  It is controlled by this small integral part of the ship.

These examples illustrate how the next few verses I will read have haunted me for many years.   In short it reads,  "the tongue is a little member, and ^aboasteth great things. Behold, how great a ^bmatter a little fire kindleth!  And the ^atongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: and setteth on fire the course of nature; But the ^atongue can no man tame; it is an ^bunruly evil, full of deadly poison."

How many of you have ever gotten in trouble because you let your tongue get away from you?  You just had to say that one thing.   One of my favorite nicknames in high school was "Mouth of the south." I earned that nickname.  I talked alot.  I still do, but imagine how much I talk now, and triple that.  I talked to people at school.  I talked to people at my various activities after school.   I even talked to people in grocery lines.  I could start a conversation about anything.  Still can!  I must have gotten that from my dad.  He was so friendly to everyone and I saw the value in that. Being involved in many people's lives, you start to get involved with their trials and challenges also. I guess that is where the trouble comes in.  I am very bold when I have an opinion.  I stand up for what I think is right and sometimes I have to step on toes to accomplish that.

How can we be so kind and just one moment, and yet, our tongues best us the next.  I can't tell you all the times, my mouth has gotten me in trouble.  I am one of those really blunt loud mouths that has to say exactly how I feel or I am going to burst.  Following the outburst, there is a moment of satisfaction, and then a world of regret.

It seems the better I know the person, the more I am more likely to do this.  I justify that this person would know me enough that it wouldn't bother them.  But I am always wrong about that.  No one likes to hear correction.  No one likes criticism.  No one likes to be told that they are not doing enough.  And I seem to have a full bucket of corrections, criticisms  and things for them to do my way.

Essentially tongues are the epitome of who we are.  Even though a very small member of our bodies, as I said before, a tongue is a fire. We may do many kind deeds in life like serving at a soup kitchen, or volunteering at the Blood drive.  We may visit the sick or the needy.  We may even change a person's life for the better.  But as soon as we say something that hurts another, all of those acts of kindness burn and turn to ash.  Later in this chapter I have read from, it says, "Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. Doth a ^afountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?

I had an "aha moment"as I sat reading these verses.  How could I profess to be one person, but allow myself to let these daggers and swords escape my tongue?  And then the memories started to roll in.  I thought of all the many broken relationships that I've had where I had to say that last part and scare them to high heaven.  I thought of the many times I had to get the last word in an argument with my parents and then to top it off with a door slam.  I thought of all the many petty fights I had with my girlfriends back in high school and college that left damaged friendships left and right.  Who would I be today if I would have found some duct tape for my mouth?  What relationships and friendships would I have prevented from harm if I would have just closed this "mouth of the south?"

Unfortunately, I have had many experiences where bitter water has flowed fitfully from my mouth.  It seemed I was unable to stop it.  Or I just didn't want to.  What I had to say needed to be said eventually, and why not be the one to say it?  That person would eventually get over it and would realize the credit of me saying it to them in the first place.  Maybe not right away, but one day.


But who was I to ruin their course of life?  Ultimately, I cannot change who they are.  I can lovingly suggest and lead and guide, but I do not even have the right to do that in most cases.  I guess there really is no point in looking back.  Although, I do think recognition of weaknesses is power.  I don't want to be one of those people that build hundreds of bridges that benefit others, and then burn them all down with hurtful words and wrong decisions made by my unruly tongue.   Taming the tongue will not be easy.  But I think of all those times where my tongue has gotten me into trouble.  Times where my tongue has ruined relationships for good.  And I am sure it will be worth it.  

Bush Whackers: Try 2

Purpose: Every speech must have a general and a specific purpose. A general purpose is to inform, to persuade, to entertain, or to inspire. A specific purpose is what you want the audience to do after listening to your speech. Once you have established your general and specific purposes, you’ll find it easy to organize your speech. You’ll also have more confidence, which makes you more convincing, enthusiastic, and sincere. Of course, the better organized the speech is, the more likely it is to achieve your purpose.

Objectives Organize the speech in a manner that best achieves those purposes. Ensure the beginning, body, and conclusion reinforce the purpose. Project sincerity and conviction and control any nervousness you may feel. Strive not to use notes.

Thank you Mr. Toastmaster.  Fellow Toastmasters, guests...

It bothers me when people beat around the bush.

Have you ever had an argument that sparks a whole bunch of unsaid feelings and emotions?  First you are fighting about whose turn it is to take out the trash, and before you know it, you are fighting over things that person did to you 5 hours ago, 5 days ago, or even 5 years ago.  When I was in college, I was engaged to a boy from Rigby Idaho.  My fiancé and I had one of these small fights.  In fact, as I tried to remember what this fight was all about, I couldn't.  It was that small.  But no matter how small I thought it was, it opened a huge can of unwanted worms in our relationship.

After the argument, he dropped me off at my apartment and I did not see him for many hours after that.  I called him numerous times to apologize for whatever I might have said.  Surely he couldn't be this mad at me…that he wouldn't even talk to me.  The next morning he didn't show up to go to church with me. All throughout my meetings I kept wondering what I had done wrong?  What could I have said to have prevented this argument?  I finally could not take it and drove to his house to confront him.  He took me to a local park and we sat down to talk things out.

He started off with, Jenny, we need to talk.  That never tends to be a great starter to a conversation with someone you love. Right then and there, I should have known I would be getting more than I had bargained for.  He tried to tell me how good I was, how he didn't deserve me.  He told me that he couldn't change who he was and who he was was not good enough for me.  He told me he loved me and just couldn't stand in my way anymore.  Anyone heard this same conversation?

As I sat listening to this flood of new, terrible information, I realized my dream of marrying him was in danger.  I tried to tell him that he was wrong that I didn't care about all that other stuff.  It was my choice and I chose him.  He told me it was not up for discussion anymore.  He wasn't going to be that guy.  What guy that was, I have no idea.  But I left feeling unsettled.  Were we officially broken up or did he need to take a break? I was more confused than I was two hours before I talked with him. 

For sake of your time, that was one of the last conversations I had with him.  He didn't answer any of my phone calls.  He did not want to see me and pushed me away when I tried to talk to him in public.  Things were left unsaid.  Questions were not answered, and because I was young and immature, I needed closure.  Instead of telling me how he really felt, he played with my poor emotions.   

Later I realized what he really should have done.  Instead of giving me a flood of crappy excuses of why he didn't want to be with me, (which took two hours) he needed to say what he really felt. He was no longer interested in marrying me.  Now let's just put it to the test.  How long would it have taken him to say what he really needed to? Anyone have a second-hand watch? (Pull out a teddy bear).    I want you to time the conversation when I say 'go' to illustrate how much easier and time effective it is to say what you mean when you really need to say it.  "Go."

I don't want to marry you.

"Stop."  Five seconds.  Five seconds compared to the two hours it took him to try to, in a very roundabout way, say the same thing.  Some people might think he was trying to soften the blow.  Believe me I'd rather have the blunt reply than the two hour spill of not saying what you mean.  That would have given me a whole hour and 58 minutes to go home, eat a bucket of greasy fried chicken and a gallon of ice cream, watch my favorite chick flick, and cry until my tear ducts were empty.  And afterwards, I am going to feel relieved I know where I stand.  I can now start making steps to moving on and finding someone better in my life.  

Fellow Toastmasters, how many times do we do this similar thing...beat around the bushes of our lives?  How many times do we choose the easier path because it is more convenient for us? 

The phrase "beating around the bush" came from an old hunting technique? Hunters, especially those hunting boars, or wild pigs, would beat at bushes and trees to get boars to run out of their hiding places. This was safer than confronting them straight on, due to the razor sharp tusks. Beating around the bush saved hunters from being injured by dangerous animals.  In this case it is a helpful idea.  In my story, beating around the bush was hurtful and left me more damaged. 

We understand why people beat around the bush...to avoid sticky situations, or to prevent people from being hurt.  But how many times does beating around the bushes of our lives prevent us from really feeling something special….or hard?  I have found I have become a stronger person because of the challenges I have endured in my life.  Do I really want to avoid them?

How much better will it be at the end of our life to say to our loved ones, “I have lived a fulfilling life?  I have said things that needed to be said.  I have done things I have said I would do.” What are the boars in our life that we do not want to confront straight on?  What dangerous animals are we hiding from?  What tasks are we putting aside because we are too scared of the risks…or the time… or the effort we would have to put in?

The big boar in my life right now is writing a children’s picture book series.  I have it right there in my mind.  I know the big idea.  I even have a plan of how I will publish pictures.  So what’s standing in my way?  My fear of being rejected?  The money?  I guess a little of all.  But even though I think time is the biggest issue, it’s actually not.  I spend so much time on my Ipod, my Facebook account, and my email each night.   I could accomplish so much if I would just stop beating around the bushes that hide my ultimate goals.  Stop hiding behind my TV and computer screens, and dedicate myself to the task.  I have the time to accomplish this task, but I also have time to beat around the bush.  I know my time would be much better spent by going after what I want.   

Instead of avoiding this boar and others, I’m going to try to tackle those life-taking beasts.  Picturing a big boar standing in the way of my dreams really helps me stay motivated.  I’m going to take control of my life and charge right through the bush...come what may.  Instead of being a bush beater, I’m going to chop that sucker down!

Mr. Toastmaster

Bush Whacking # 3

Purpose: Every speech must have a general and a specific purpose. A general purpose is to inform, to persuade, to entertain, or to inspire. A specific purpose is what you want the audience to do after listening to your speech. Once you have established your general and specific purposes, you’ll find it easy to organize your speech. You’ll also have more confidence, which makes you more convincing, enthusiastic, and sincere. Of course, the better organized the speech is, the more likely it is to achieve your purpose.

Objectives Organize the speech in a manner that best achieves those purposes. Ensure the beginning, body, and conclusion reinforce the purpose. Project sincerity and conviction and control any nervousness you may feel. Strive not to use notes.

(Sit a teddy bear on the lectern and turn sideways to it so you are talking to it.)

You know, it's been a great three months of dating you.  I....just feel like we're in different spots in our life.  You deserve better than me...someone who can love you the way you should be loved.  I am standing in your way and there is someone waiting out there for you.  

Oh my gosh!!!  Don't you just want to slap this girl!  Instead of telling him how she really feels she is playing with his emotions.  Tell the poor boy you are just not that into him.  Stop beating around the bush and say what you really feel.  

Fellow Toastmasters, how many times do we do this similar thing...beat around the bushes of our lives?  How many times do we choose the easier path because it is more convenient? 

The phrase "beating around the bush" came from an old hunting technique? Hunters, especially those hunting boars, or wild pigs, would beat at bushes and trees to get boars to run out of their hiding places. This was safer than confronting them straight on, due to the razor sharp tusks. Beating around the bush saved hunters from being injured by dangerous animals.  In this case it is a helpful idea.

But what if that boar was having a child.  Or going back to school.  Or getting your finances in order.  Or finally working off those holiday pounds.  Would we want to hide behind our computers, or our games, or our TVs? 

What are the boars in our life that we do not want to confront straight on?  What dangerous animals are we hiding from?  What tasks are we putting aside because we are too scared of the risks…or the time… or the effort we would have to put in?

There are many reasons why a person might choose to beat around the bush. Most commonly, it is done when a topic that needs to be discussed is unpleasant. In my breakup example, if a young woman has decided to break up her long-term relationship with her boyfriend, she may not come right out and say "we're through." That would be like attacking a boar.  She is more likely to discuss taking her life in a new direction, showing weaknesses of their current relationship, or sharing benefits from moving on from their life together. This allows her to more gently bring up the subject, and may even get her boyfriend to initiate a conversation about breaking up before she does.  In this case it benefits her without crushing him.  But sometimes, slow deaths are the most painful.  You can get straight to the point without being offensive.  It’s hard, but it’s possible. 

Another time that someone may beat around the bush is when they are asked a question that they don't have a good answer for. An alcoholic may resort to beating around the bush if he or she is asked about the amount of alcohol they regularly drink. A compulsive spender may do the same when asked about his or her finances. This avoidance technique attempts to answer a question without giving a direct response.

Avoiding getting straight into a discussion about something important can have negative consequences, especially in the workplace. Not being able to get right to the point when discussing major business moves can make employees appear unprepared for a meeting. Parents have a harder time teaching their children discipline when they beat around the bush.  Couples who cannot openly discuss problems may have a hard time staying together. While there are times that tactfully beating around the bush may be appropriate, it is generally better to be able to come right out with the matter at hand, instead of trying to indirectly hint at it.

Think about how many relationship problems could have been avoided by coming out with the problem instead of hacking at each other until both are hurting.   We understand why people beat around the bush...to avoid sticky situations, or to prevent people from being hurt.  But how many times does beating around the bushes of our lives prevent us from really feeling something special.  Or hard.  Don't we become stronger people because of the hard things or special events we go through in life?  Do we really want to avoid them then?

How much better will it be at the end of our life to say to our loved ones, “I have lived a fulfilling life?  I have said things that needed to be said.  I have done things I have said I would do.” 

Instead of avoiding the boars and dangerous animals of our lives, let's tackle those life-taking beasts.  Let's take control of our lives and charge right through the bush...come what may.  Let's climb those Mount Everests, of our lives...whether that means taking the jump to mending a relationship, going back to college, chasing an impossible dream job, or even taking that 1^st piano class.  Instead of bush beaters, let’s be bush whackers. 

Mr. Toastmaster

Other resources:

There are many reasons why a person might choose to beat around the bush. Most commonly, it is done when a topic that needs to be discussed is unpleasant. For example, if a young woman has decided to break up her long-term relationship with her boyfriend, she may not come right out and say "we're through." She is more likely to discuss taking her life in a new direction, any personal changes she has experienced, or even the benefit of dating several different partners before marriage. This allows her to more gently bring up the subject, and may even get her boyfriend to initiate a conversation about breaking up before she does.

Another time that someone may beat around the bush is when they are asked a question that they don't have a good answer for. An alcoholic may resort to beating around the bush if he or she is asked about the amount of alcohol they regularly drink. A compulsive spender may do the same when asked about his or her finances. This avoidance technique attempts to answer a question without giving a direct response.

Avoiding getting straight into a discussion about something important by trying to beat around the bush can have negative consequences, especially in the workplace. Not being able to get right to the point when discussing major business moves can make employees appear to be unprepared for the meeting. Parents have a harder time teaching their children discipline when they beat around the bush, and couples who cannot openly discuss problems they may be having will have a hard time staying together. While there are times that tactfully beating around the bush may be appropriate, it is generally better to be able to come right out with the matter at hand, instead of trying to indirectly hint at it.

When someone is avoiding a topic of conversation by sidetracking or using other evasion techniques, it may be said that they are trying to beat around the bush. It is a way of saying that someone is avoiding a problem. It usually involves trying to indirectly work towards a subject, without coming right out with it.

Beating around the bush is called a figure of speech, or an idiom. An idiom is a phrase that cannot be literally translated in a way that makes sense. The meaning has to be taken figuratively. Idioms usually stem from a more literal translation of the phrase that used to be relevant in people's lives. The phrase "beating around the bush" came from an old hunting technique. Hunters, especially those hunting boars, or wild pigs, would beat at bushes and trees to get boars to run out of their hiding places. This was safer than confronting them straight on, due to the razor sharp tusks. Beating around the bush saved hunters from being injured by dangerous animals.

#2 Organize your Speech: Expeditionary Learning

Objectives:

Create a strong opening and conclusion. Select an appropriate outline which allows listeners to easily follow and understand your speech. Make your message clear, with supporting material directly contributing to that message. Use appropriate transitions when moving from one idea to another.

#2 Organize your Speech: Expeditionary Learning

A teacher really is a special calling.  There are many reasons why I love teaching at Venture Academy.  Three reasons really explain why I accepted the job.  I have liberty to create my own curriculum, the school focuses on service, and it is a hands-on approach to learning.

When I was a student teacher in Las Vegas, I remember when I was finally able to take the reins of the classroom, lessons, and planning.  I had taken weeks of my precious dating time to plan a fabulous unit on health.  I planned engaging work with a celebration of learning at the end, where they shared the work they had completed.  Everything turned out great. My assessment from my cooperating teacher at the end of the unit although was very disappointing.  The only critique I can remember from that meeting was that I did not stick to the lessons laid out in the book.  She pointed out the chapters of reading I had skipped to include this unit.  She stressed how important it was to stick to the curriculum.  I felt frustrated that she disliked my creative energy.

Instead of teaching at a school where they scripted what I needed to teach, I searched for one that would allow me to create my own curriculum.  When I interviewed at Venture, the director introduced me to Expeditionary Learning.  Instead of teaching random topics sporadically throughout the year, like what I was doing in Vegas, teachers choose topics that are locally connected to students.  For example, some of our past expeditions have been the Transcontinental Railroad, Bird Migration, or the one we are currently doing, the Wasatch Mountains.  Students have one science expedition and one social studies expedition each year.  That subject is then taught in depth for 12-16 weeks.  The Language Arts and Math classes support what they need to know to accomplish tasks for completing projects in expedition.  Instead of letting the curriculum drive the teaching, teachers drive the learning. Teachers spend months and months building workshops around Expedition topics.  We are “Master Googlers.”  It takes a lot of work, but in the end we feel ownership in what we teach, because we created it.

The second reason that I love Venture is that it fosters service within our school and local community.  Two years ago, the 3'rd-5th grade teachers including me, taught about the Ogden River.  In our expeditions, we always have a culminating product to prove our learning.  We always strive to make the audience as authentic, or real as possible.  My class chose to create a book that not only talked about the learning that was associated with the Ogden River, but they provided information about its history and the new Restoration project being completed on it.

We found out that the Ogden River marathon was coming up and signed up to have a booth.  We sold these books and donated the proceeds to the Ogden River Restoration fund.  We wanted to reach out to more than just our school and to the people passing through the booths.  So the students created signs with facts about the Ogden River.  We placed them very strategically throughout their race.  While the runners sprinted through the Ogden Canyon, they saw a sign for every mile of their run.  The students loved sharing what they knew and being part of something bigger.  Serving others always makes you feel good, and students never forget that.

Lastly, Venture Academy has adopted a hands-on approach to learning. Reading textbooks and then answering questions...filling out worksheets...taking tests after they finish a reading assignment, this is the pattern of a normal school.  Ours is a special approach, one that fosters kid's energy and intelligence.  Kids love to be able to move around when they learn, to talk about it, and to share.  They love to experiment, to discover answers without it being handed to them.  We encourage that inquiry type of learning....and it is exciting!

For example, two weeks ago, we were talking about how mountains were formed.  We learning about how rocks are weathered and eroded, and how they go through a process called the rock cycle.  Instead of reading a textbook or completing a worksheet, I wanted them to experience a rock going through the rock cycle.  So we did a little experiment.

Rocks take thousands and sometimes millions of years to change into another type or rock, so we couldn't literally take a rock through the rock cycle.  But that didn't stop me.  We used crayons instead.  We shaved the crayon down into "sediment" and moved them into an aluminum foil boat.  We held the boats over a candle flame and watched as our sediments melted from the heat and pressure. When the new "rock" cooled and hardened, the state of the rock changed again.  This simple experiment was a hands-on approach to learn about the rock cycle.  No students were hurt in this process, and the learning was driven deep, deep enough that it will be remembered.   

I knew I made the right decision when I said yes to the job at Venture Academy. Yes to creating my own curriculum; Yes to a school that focuses on serving others; Yes to hands-on learning.  Loving what you do is pretty essential to any job.  People spend a bulk of their life doing what gets them by.  I get by…by doing what I love.  

Reflection of #2
I felt really scattered before the speech.  I was upset with Fred and we were rushing around.  I didn't get the Ogden River book and was frustrated I would be able to use it in my speech.  It was unpracticed.  My last week I had practiced for three weeks.  I thought about it more.  It was more interesting, although after you look at a speech for so long, you start to feel tired of it.  Then you change it.  Then you practice it many times and get tired again.

I was speaking the same day as Peeta and Shirley and they are very practiced,  and I knew I would not even compare.  But I did okay.  I still held on to the lectern  but I did leave it a couple of times.  I just need to memorize the speech and speak from my heart.  Believe in what I am saying.  See through the words, the stuttering, and the weaknesses within myself.

I never go directly with what I have prepared.  No speech ever turns out the way you thought.  But it always turns out better than one might expect.  I did slip up with a few words, but I persevered and even gave a few laughs.


Everyone commented on how they wanted to go back to school after they heard how excited I was about teaching.  They mentioned how passionate I was and how that showed.

#1 Icebreaker: Chasing Dreams

Note: This is normally the first speech delivered by a Toastmaster in their club. The time is 4 to 6 minutes and, while you can say whatever you want, it’s normally used as an opportunity to introduce yourself to the other club members. That way at least you know the content and can concentrate on getting over the nerves.

Mr Toastmaster, Ladies and Gentlemen,

One of the most important things in this life is to love and accept who you are and chase after who you want to become.  

I am a Flake. I have always been proud of my maiden name.  Corn Flake, bran flake, frosted flake, dandruff flake…I’ve heard them all before. If you have another more interesting crack at my last name, I'd love to hear it. Snowflake is my favorite because my great-great great grandfather William Jordan Flake colonized Snowflake Arizona.  It reminds me that for years and years, my relatives have also chased their dreams and became who they wanted to be. 

The word "flake" generally has a pretty negative connotation.   By definition a flake is an unreliable person; someone who agrees to do something, but never follows through.  I am here to introduce you to a new kind of flake.  We stand for the truth.  We stand for the right.  When we commit, we are in it till the end.  We chase after what and who we want to become.  Some experiences from my life will help illustrate this.

First example...When I was 2 years old, my parents took me to Pensacola University to watch the BYU Ballroom and Folk Dance teams.  I was fascinated with the dancing…the costumes...the excitement that lingered in the air after the show was finished.  I leaned over to my parents and said in my two-year old voice, "I want to be a B-I-U dancer." 23 years later, I fulfilled that dream.  I was accepted to BYU-Idaho. When I made the Ballroom dance tour team, my dream became a reality.  I was a BYU-I dancer. See…my two year old self knew there was an “I” in the mix somewhere.  I enjoyed every minute.

Next example:  I figured out my career at the ripe old age of 5.  I loved my kindergarten teacher, and knew that's what I wanted to be.  On the last day of school, while other kids ran out screaming for their new-found freedom, I went through the teachers piles of throw-out worksheets.  I took the bulk of them home and played school in a fall-out shelter with my neighbors all summer long. The only problem was we all wanted to be teachers, so I never had any students in my class.  I am currently teaching in my fifth year and learning and loving every day.

My last example of chasing dreams explains why I am standing in front of you tonight.  When I was 14, I started listening to motivational tapes of youth speakers from my church.  Troy Dunn, Joann Hibbert Hamilton, and John Bytheway were my heroes.  I listened to a variety of topics that really helped and encouraged me in those troubled teen years. I knew that one day I wanted to become a motivational speaker myself.  I started preparing talks and speeches at home and I currently have around 20-25 talks and speeches ready to give at a moment’s notice.

I heard of Toastmasters from a friend a few weeks ago who I had shared this goal with.  Now I stand before you sharing my life story with new and undiscovered friends.  To become the public speaker I want to be, I know it will take many times of getting up in front of you, sharing my thoughts and feelings on various subjects. This journey I will take in Toastmasters reminds me of the process of how gold is made.

In the process of refining gold, it is heated up to a very high temperature. This causes the impurities to come to the top and then that dross is scooped off of the gold.   The temperature is increased incrementally and this process is repeated. When there is no more dross that floats to the top and the refiner can look at the gold as a mirror and see his own image, he knows that the gold is finally pure. 

I am sure I will struggle with different aspects of speaking and evaluating myself and others.  I am sure there will be many tears of frustration.  No dream comes without them. And just as gold is thrown in and out of the fire, it is not finished until the temperature has increased and all of the dross has been removed.  I hope to work out those kinks in my speaking and pursue this life-long goal of becoming an influence for good.  Chasing after this dream is the right choice for me at this point of my life, and I thank you in advance for being a part of it.  

Mr. Toastmaster

Evaluation of icebreaker

I had a feeling that someone might cancel their speech.  I also had the feeling I would try to volunteer a week earlier and take said spot! Well that is exactly what happened.  Joy cancelled and I quickly volunteered, although I knew I could have done better if I would have just waited.  Oh well...I was excited to start.

Dick Carr was my evaluator.  I was ready to go.  I was the second speaker.  The one before me went 10 minutes.  I was about to pull out my hair before it was over.  He was an okay speaker, but he rambled on and on and on.   He didn't have a script, and I really don;t think he prepared anything.  Well, then it was my turn.

I had my notes and outline, and never did look at my outline.  I looked at my whole written speech instead....and I did look down at it, but I had memorized most of it.  I shook a little, but not as much as when I gave it to my family on Thanksgiving night.  Mmmm... what does that tell me.

I missed one complete big thought about me actually becoming a teacher.  So I think I am going to base me next speech on being a teacher.

Rick told that I had a great speaking voice.  Some critique I received was to try to memorize the speech, and move away from the lectern.

For a first time, I didn't feel I did too bad, and I have spoke five times in the last year in church so it wasn't like I went in their cold turkey.  I want to try to do without my notes next time.



Chasing Dreams Outline

One of the most important thing in this life....

A.  I am a flake!

1. Corn flake
2. Snowflake
3. William Jordan Flake
4. Reminds me relatives have also chased

B.  Flake=negative connotation

1. Unreliable person
2. Agrees to do something
3. No follow through
4. We stand
5. When we say
6. Examples from my life

C.  2 years old

1. Pensacola University
2. BYU Ballroom and Folk dance teams
3. Costumes, music, excitement that lingered
4. 23 years later
5. BYU-Idaho
6. A few letters off

D.  Career at 5 yrs of age

1. Kindergarten teacher
2. Worksheets
3. Fall-out shelter
4. No students
5. Venture Academy

E.  Why I am standing here today

1. Motivational tapes
2. Troy Dunn
3. Variety of topics
4. Troubled teen years
5. Preparing talks and speeches

F.  Toastmasters

1. Friend introduced
2. New and undiscovered friends
3. Many times of getting up
4. Journey of Toastmaster reminds me of how gold is made

G.  Process of refining gold

1. Heated up
2. Impurities to come 
3. Dross is scooped off
4. Temperature is increased
5. No more dross 
6. Gold as a mirror
7. Finally pure

H.  Struggle

1. Tears of frustration
2. No dream
3. Just as gold is thrown
4. it is not finished until
5. I hope to work out these kinks
6. Chasing after this dream
7. I thank you in advance

Extra "stuff" that wouldn'tfit in a 4-6 minute speech


First paragraph
Opening yourself to others is always a little challenging.  Most are afraid to reveal what is inside.  Some are too willing to give pieces of themselves away.  So many times in life, people try to peg you as a certain type of person.  Stereotypes overwhelm you.  Disappointment, discouragement and failure destroy what you are trying to be.  

Extra stuff that wouldn't fit but that would have gone after my "school" paragraph
I grew up in a small town in southeast Georgia.  I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and our small branch or church group had a set of missionaries who would teach others about our church and beliefs.  My family invited the missionaries over at least once a week.  I grew up with these 18-25 year old men and women who set prime examples of who I wanted to be.  My father and 3 brothers served honorable missions in various places throughout the world, and I yearned to become one myself.  I also wanted to share what I knew. 

I was honored to be called to serve for 18 months in the Nevada, Las Vegas mission. Before entering the mission field, every elder or sister must undergo some training in the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah.   I remember feeling frustrated with my district I had been assigned to.  The elders and sisters were nonchalant about being there.  It seemed the decision was already made for them and it was something they were just supposed to do.  I had looked forward to this experience for so long, and my expectations were so high that when it finally came, I was disappointed that it wasn't everything I had hoped. I wrote my dad and explained my frustrations.  This was his reply: 

"Be a Sister Flake.  You are the first sister missionary of Grandma and Grandpa Flake. I know they are very proud of you and your decision to go on a mission. You join a long line of Flakes that have a served a mission from the William Jordan Flake family. You represent the whole family in what you do."